Twin Flame vs. Soul Mate

What’s the difference between

a Twin Flame and a Soul Mate?


Have you ever experienced a heartbreaking relationship?

A relationship that at first felt so real, it felt like you were destined to be together? It was like your connection was unbreakable, and that your intuition was confirming that this was the right person for you? 

Then something happened and it all fell apart. And you couldn’t understand why, but you knew that you had some kind of cosmic connection. That is because this person was not your soul mate, this person was your twin flame.

There are conflicting beliefs when it comes to defining twin flame and soul mate relationships.

I personally believe that a twin flame is a romantic relationship with whom you have shared a past life with and owe a karmic debt to. While a soul mate is a soul whom you choose to meet up with from your past lives to continue to share a soul-nourishing relationship with deep, unconditional love and mutual respect. 

Both relationships enable spiritual growth and are imperative to your soul’s journey, but your twin flame relationship pushes you to grow through pain, while your soul mate encourages your growth through pleasure.

Let’s compare the two types of relationships for better understanding.

Twin Flame relationship characteristics:

  • Past life connection
  • Karmic debt
  • Great love, but it’s not meant to last
  • Brings heartbreak, pain, sadness, and trauma 
  • Changes your perception and opens you up in a new way 
  • Pushes you out of your comfort zone
  • Break up can lead to spiritual awakening
  • Allows you to heal and grow from it

Soul Mate relationship characteristics: 

  • Past life connection
  • No karmic debt 
  • Unconditional love 
  • Brings mutual support, respect, and love
  • You help each other grow and learn through positive vibrations 
  • You’re enabling each other to be the best version of yourselves 
  • You feel stable, strong, and secure around each other 
  • Never-ending cycle of giving and receiving support that creates growth 

Because our soul is always striving to achieve transformation, we sometimes need to fall in love with the wrong person. We need to experience difficult relationships and challenging environments in order to expand, change, and evolve. 

So if you have walked into a relationship that you believed was going to be a soul mate reunion, only to be discarded in the worst possible way, dig deep within and ask yourself if this was a karmic debt from a past life that needed to be repaid. 

Karmic debt is not an excuse for unethical behavior, but it can be used to provide peace and understanding for some actions which may be completely unexplainable. Regardless of whether the relationship was karmic related or not, one thing is certain: the current relationship was insulting your soul and it needed to end.

Sometimes, the actual event that leads up to the end is devastatingly traumatic, but it needed to be because the connection you held together was so incredibly strong you needed a point of no return. 

How to heal from a Twin Flame Relationship?


Go through the process of healing from this relationship as you would with every healing (You can read more about rituals that assist healing in my book Align With Soul): 


1) Acknowledge the pain, give the energy a creative channel to be expressed, move through with cleansing, replenishing, and honoring your internal soul. Take your time and repeat these steps as often as needed. 


2) Forgive yourself, the other person, let go and make peace with what has happened.


3) Follow through with cutting the energy cord, cleansing the energy of any objects, and if you feel capable of journeying on your own to explore the past life karmic debt, do so. Or, seek outside help for assistance. 


4) Once you feel as though you have honored and grieved the relationship and are ready, manifest your greatest self, and the kind of love you wish to invite in. 

If this happened to you, trust that you are divinely guided by the hand of your Higher Self, and remind yourself to journey back within to find the answers you seek. Karmic debt does not require constant attention or connection. It requires you to acknowledge the lesson, and open yourself up to grow into a new person. 

So there you go. We have twin flames and soul mates. Both from past lives. But with different purposes. Your Twin Flame is here to challenge you, to push you to grow through heartbreak, pain, and sadness. Your Soul Mate is also here to help you grow and evolve, but through pleasure, happiness, peace, and support.

Some people believe in many soul mates, such as friends and family members, and others believe that the role I have explained of the twin flame versus soul mate is actually reversed. To argue over who is right is on the same grounds of which religion is correct. 

There is no answer, so just trust whatever you believe in your heart.

Love Phoebe


PS: If you need support with healing your broken heart, I have a 10 day course that can support your healing with journaling exercises and guided meditations. 

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